The blessed art of Killing your SELF

My meditation on Jesus' Demand to Deny our SELF

As far as you are concerned, you yourself are God's greatest rival.

It is astonishing when you realize how much SELF — self-seeking, self-admiration, self-dependence, yourself insisting on it's own way, self-comfort, security of the self, fun for the self —enters into almost every thought and intention of your day. Even setting dreadful self-righteousness aside, our natural man is there always in the way, jumping up & down, between us and the Glory of God.

Our hearts deceive us as we seek SELF's praise in what we supposedly do for God or for other men & women in the Body of Christ. How keen we are, especially those standing in front of the crowd, for the admiration and applause of other people. Did you feel SELF swell last Sunday when the people lined up to congratulate your sermon? How eager is SELF to be pre-eminent, to be seen as exalted above our peers.

How intensely do men work if they see some advantage over another or the possibility for SELF to be seen as "rightly" more important than another man. How fiercely and with cunning will a man seek a position in which other men will defer to his opinions. How many sought-after career promotions are unvarnished attempts to appear more valuable than the others? How many Mothers groom and discipline their little ones so that they appear "rightly" superior to the other children? How many youths are driven to study not to serve or glorify God, but rather to surpass others so that SELF is exalted as it deserves and the coveted entrance to that University is realized, which will almost certainly seal their doom. How deceitful is this self-esteem trumpet blasting in our elementary schools.

Count the ways that your SELF draws you away from the very heart of God!

The work of yourself is stealthy and devious and its influence and power are extensive. The spirit of a man knows the man and armed with this knowledge the corrupt heart deceives the man and draws him from seeing his moment-by-moment need of Christ's Throne of Grace, and worse, draws him from loving God with his whole heart — to loving and serving SELF moment-by moment with his whole corrupt heart.

Only by persistent death and denial of the SELF (the blessed art of mortifying our sin natures, that is so hard to learn) can we keep this rival from perverting our motives, lowering our aspirations, and corrupting our affections that are to be turned away from SELF to Things Above.

O, Christians, declare relentless war on this enemy, SELF who obscures and robs God of his rightful, thorough Glory.

I learned this because this is my heart. Dearest Savior, rescue me from my SELF!

More love to you on this Valentine's Day

Excerpt from Of Communion with God the Father, Son and Holy Ghost by John Owen (1657)

The Holy Spirit pours the love of God into our hearts (Rom. 5:5).

This refers to the love of God to us and not our love to God. It encompasses God’s love in accomplishing His purposes to do us good and His gracious love of acceptance and approval. Both these are called the love of God in Scripture. Now, how can these be poured into our hearts? By giving us a spiritual understanding of them. God pours the Holy Spirit abundantly on us who persuades us that God loves us so that our souls become filled with joy and comfort. This is His work and He does it effectively. To persuade a poor, sinful soul that God in Jesus Christ loves him, delights in him, is well pleased with him and only has thoughts of kindness towards him is an inexpressible mercy. [To persuade a man further that this delight continues forever is a consolation beyond belief].

This is the special work of the Holy Spirit and by this special work we have communion with the Father in His love, which is poured into our hearts. So not only do we rejoice in and glorify the Holy Spirit who does this work, but in the Father also, whose love it is. It is the same in respect of the Son, as the loving Holy Spirit takes the things of Christ and reveals them to us. What we have of heaven in this world lies in this work of the Holy Spirit who loves us. Happy Valentine’s Day.

Satiated at last

Affections Fixed Above

Excerpt from The Saint’s Everlasting Rest by Richard Baxter (1652)

There is great value in a heart set upon heaven. Affections fixed above is the way to live with vitality and abundantly. It is the best preventive against temptations. It will be your best comfort in troubles. It will make you most helpful to others. It will greatly glorify and honor God.

A heart set upon heaven is an evidence of your sincerity. If you ask, "How can I know that I am truly being sanctified?" this will provide a sure sign from the mouth of Jesus Christ himself—"Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also" (Matt. 6:21). God is the saints' treasure and happiness; Heaven and the New Earth is the place where they can fully enjoy Him and live in the brightness of his full Presence. A heart, therefore, set upon heaven, is a heart set upon God. Christians, if you would like a proof of your title to glory, keep your thoughts on heaven. You stand in the very vestibule of Heaven.

Every generation must pray against indifference

Written by Robert Murray Mc’Cheyne in 1838.

There is nothing more distressing in our day than the lack of growth among the children of God. They do not seem to be pressing forward; they do not seem to be running a race; they don't perceive the spiritual war on Earth and in the Heavenlies. When I compare this year with last year, alas! where is the difference?—the same weakness, same coldness and even more indifference toward divine things.

How different when the Spirit is poured out! They will become like willows beside the river. You have seen the willow, how it grows—not stopping day or night, ever growing, ever shooting out new branches. Cut it down—it springs again. Ah! so will it be, dear Christians, when there is an outpouring by the Spirit of Christ, the wind filling our sails.

Letter to a prisoner

Dear Morris,

Interesting Question: why has God chosen this difficult path for you? Or, you ask, with all the previous suffering and anguish I’ve known, is this current added burdensome trial really necessary? Put another way, why is the Providence of God so severe for some and not others? Great theological minds have grappled greatly with this. I have little to offer because I too am perplexed by why God’s paths for people are so different. Why do some with as much faith and trust in God as you have, never seem to find a place of steady comfort and a position of strength to live from. I know that someone in your current situation, does not want shallow, petty, glib answers to things.

Over the last few years, I had two close Christian friends die. In both cases, I spent a lot of time with them in their final two years to comfort them in their spiritual distress. Both were extraordinarily passionate in their faith in God and their love for Him. They seemed less concerned about their physical ailments than the bigger questions of why their lives were so unfulfilled. Both died unfulfilled, feeling that they had very little to show by way of service and fruit for the Lord. I encouraged both of them that God took delight in the fact that they “loved Him through the pain.” I counsel you to do the same.

Tell God that you are confused AND disappointed by the painful path He laid out for you to walk, but also tell Him of your desire to love Him dearly because of who He is and ask Him to build deep trust in His Sovereignty, Love, and Infinite Wisdom. As hard as it is to believe, He means to do you good by His severe dealings with you. Remember, as you read Job, God didn’t answer Job’s questions; He rather showed up as the powerful, majestic God and Job was silenced. But let me speculate that perhaps God knows you so well, that in His Wisdom He knew that without this severe path to humble you and crush your self-dependence, you would have destroyed yourself. You would have cheerfully taken the broad path to hell. Perhaps God knew that without these severe obstacles, you would have been eternally undone. It is your pain that has caused you to ponder the right questions and make attempts to deeply trust Him.

In your current situation of brokeness, remember that God adores a broken heart and a contrite spirit. Ask God for wisdom. Ask God for Meekness and Humility. Ask God for deeper trust in Him. Ask God for the miracle of giving you deep contentment in Him even there in Prison. Ask God to cause the fruit of His Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control) to grow so much in your heart, that it bursts out to bless everyone around you. Ask God for one of the greatest of all gifts: a zeal for His Glory. Then wait. You might have to wait 10 years for these fantastic gifts, but persevere in asking and you will know an unspeakable joy, even here on Earth. All of these gifts come directly from God (they are not native to your corrupt heart) and He tells us to ask for what we want. Let the suffering you have known lead you to a place of godly desire. And finally, dear friend, I encourage to practice the hard discipline of THANKING God for the difficult, painful path He has chosen for you.

Prosperity injures the Ungodly; Adversity blesses the Godly

Inspired from reading the journal of Whitmore Winslow, son of Octavius (1850)

Simmering behind the scenes of our daily meandering is this persistent wish that things would go smoothly. If I could get this new job or this difficult co-worker would just move on, or my daughter would be less surly toward her Mom, my life would be so much easier. But, how detestable we would all become if our lives were smooth like we wished them to be. How indifferent and lifeless we are until stirred up by adverse circumstances. O, how we should cherish every chastisement and difficult circumstance we receive from the Lord! The Lord Jesus, who adores us, sends these adversities that He knows we need so badly.

We sometimes envy worldly unbelievers because they seem to go on selfishly hurting all around them, and yet prosper year after year. But, as David concluded, things are not as they appear, to our time-bound perception. God leaves the ungodly to the course they have chosen for themselves, until one day they awake at the judgement, defenseless. Their prosperity is not the blessing they imagine it to be. It is a judgment against their enmity with God, their neglect and contempt for the means of grace, and their indifference to the suffering people around them. All of their efforts are driven by self-interest and if there is any generosity, it ends (like the Mafia) with their immediate family. The best things in this life harm the ungodly; the worst things bless the godly. Oh, how blind we often are to the truth of how Life really is. The Infinite Wisdom of God confounds the ungodly as it confounds those doomed, evil principalities and powers at work in the heavenlies.

But He watches over every step of His children as He corrects them, sometimes gently, other times severely. With the care of the Only all-wise, deeply loving Father, all that He does is for our good now and forever. O, what a mysterious life the godly weave.